This blog is one I have been writing with the tiny pen I have in my head. The pen comes up with all kinds of sentences as I chuckle, and think about writing them down. This weekend I was busy being lazy with my husband at the beach, with no children. I say the word ” busy ” completely out of context. We weren’t busy at all, in fact we had no agenda, other than to not be busy. There are SO many jokes I can make , but will refrain because I am a Christian woman.
In all of this time of not being busy, we sure had time to get busy. By that I mean, we brought this thousand piece puzzle and worked on it all weekend five feet from each other, because babies.
Being on vacation with your spouse when no children are present makes you realize things about your relationship, and yourself. With no background noise you can actually hear your self think, and talk! It’s amazing the conversations you can have without an interruption. Like this important one:
” Honey, where do you want to go get breakfast tomorrow?”
( silence. I heard breathing. He situated his butt on the sofa )
” Wherever you want to go babe. “
Just like that we said two sentences without interruption, AND we referred to each other as affectionate names, because we weren’t yelling over noise.
During this weekend get away I learned so many things about our marriage, and each other…and I would like to share them with you. You know, in hopes that tonight after you read this you will see your spouse in a different light, after you get the kids in bed. God speed!
- I REALLY do like wine. Not just the relaxation it gives me after a long day of being a Mom of three. I ENJOY the taste. Who knew?
- I love snuggling with my husband after a day of shopping, and I do this willingly. Instead of being so tired of tiny hands touching me that I form a bubble around my body after 8 pm.
- I realized that at home I don’t really wash my whole body, mostly because a toddler is trying to get in with her clothes on. But you know, just key parts. This weekend I washed all of me, and I felt refreshed. That’s gross right?
- I realized that I don’t REALLY hate when my husband tickles me, as long as there is no fight breaking out between the two oldest children about who will save me from Daddy.
- Coffee is still delicious even without a 4 year old asking for Goldfish right after her breakfast. Coffee is necessary regardless of being a mother or not. It is life.
- On vacation you can choose outfits according to what you really want to wear, and not according to if ” it’s mom enough”. This weekend I wore shorts that were borderline ” not mom length”. But no one knew I was a Mom, because I took the sign off my forehead and replaced it with ” tourist.”
- Sitting at dinner I was able to share a nice meal with my man without grabbing someone off the floor, or under the table. And to those of you that your children never do this, are you related to that Super Nanny on TV? Can I get her number? Just Kidding. She scares me.
- When your arms aren’t carrying diaper bags, or toddlers, or teddy bears needed for sanity purposes, you will find that you will hold your spouses hand more. Pinch their butt, and offer a neck massage while standing in line to eat breakfast at a diner. Free hands mean many things, including waving at nearby children because you miss your own. Which then results in talking about your children back at home.
- When you leave your kids at home, you will find other kids that are cute. You will blow kisses to them ( weird ) and have a sudden urge to hug them ( also weird ) only because you miss yours at home. It’s then that they cry and you remember why you are on vacation in the first place.
- I enjoy my husbands company so much. He is fun to be around, and I am so so when I don’t have a toddler on my hip begging for my breast that dried up months ago.
Luckily for me I married a man that knows that my main love language is quality time. This does not mean after the kids go to bed and we are alone. This means, HUSBAND TAKE ME AWAY , and let me sleep. So this he did. The first day he finally woke me up at 11 am, but only because he was hungry. The condo we stayed in had no food. The poor man was wasting away, so I fed him diner food. I worked hard putting pants on , and brushing my teeth , so we could leave the condo. No one wants to see Mommy’s stretch marks. Not even myself, moving on.
Like everything in life that is hard, sometimes we just need to take a step back to appreciate that the hard things are a blessing. Doing life at home with three children and a husband that works his butt off is a blessing. All the cleaning that I do, is not a blessing. Sorry, I didn’t mean to type that.
On vacation, we relaxed. We ate good food. We slept in late. Our butts got a nice flattening sitting on the sofa watching movies uninterrupted. We remembered what we liked about each other, and why we fell in love. It was a breath of fresh air for us both, and a lovely way not bicker about who let the toddler have a pop-sickle near the white carpet.
No one stuck a crayon up their nose, and I didn’t have to re heat my coffee so much that I was sure I would glow from radiation. It was peaceful, and still and lovely. But all the while I didn’t know what to do with the quiet.