As a follower of Jesus , and a spirit lead Christian I am not a sinner. Though I may sin , it does not define who I am. Nor Do I define myself as a sinner. When we say that we are sinners, we are directly counting a loss what Christ did on the cross for us. He died so that we may live in relationship with him, and that we would not be DEFINED by our sins. I am a daughter of the most high King. He doesn’t call me a sinner, he calls me his beloved daughter.
Being HIS daughter, I have the responsibility to guard my heart. Guard the unity of my relationship with Him. Guard who I come into contact with. Who I let influence my thoughts and heart.
Friends, Boundaries are made to keep us safe. Since He paid for our freedom to stand against sinning, we also have the freedom set boundaries. We have the freedom to say no. We have the freedom to stand up for ourselves, and the freedom to back away from a toxic environment.
I spent a tearful morning hugging my coffee mug and talking to my Dad on the phone. Life events weren’t exactly fun when I awoke this morning and I needed my Fathers advice. Our personalities and giftings are very similar , and I knew I could be honest with him. He gave me many analogies which were helpful, including this one:
It’s 6:30 pm , you set the table for supper and call your family to the table. One by one they sit and you smile that you’ve created an environment where they feel loved and safe. You open up in prayer, and begin eating. The door bell rings and you get up from your table to respond to the ringer. You open up the door and ask what your neighbor needs. He wants you to come over to his house and see his new garden. You tell him that no, you cannot come right now. You are eating with your family.
You sit down, having lost time with your family. Five minutes later the door bell rings. It’s your neighbor yet again asking you to come see his new garden. You explain again that you are eating, and you can come later. He gets angry and upset and accuses you of not being a loving Christian.
If you were you would leave your family and go look at his garden. Maybe afterwards invite him inside to eat your food. But what your neighbor doesn’t see is that you respect yourself, and your time with your family. And if he respected you, he wouldn’t knock at dinner time.
This situation happens so often in our lives where we allow people to run over us in the name of being Christ like. Christ didn’t call us to be doormats, but to stand up for ourselves. Regardless of other peoples opinions about our choices. We don’t have to be friends with everyone, love them yes. Converse with them , no.
So lock the door. Don’t open it while you’re eating dinner. Enjoy your family. Enjoy your food. This doesn’t make you a bad person. Unloving, or uncaring. It makes you wise.
This morning I was asking the Lord to toughen my emotions. To give me a thicker skin, Not let me be so sensitive when people take what I say wrongly, and accuse me of not being a loving person. With tears running down my face I heard him say:
” I love that you are sensitive . I made no mistake making you that way. “
Friends, stop asking the Lord to change how he made you. He made you that way for a reason. But what we CAN ask him to do with the way he made us is this:
Lord, I ask you to use the things in me that you love. And rid myself of things that you did not create, but I did.